Love for Jersey Shore

Bridget Tobin
February 2, 2010
Filed under Lighter Side

Top 10 most important life lessons I have learned from watching MTV’s “Jersey Shore”:

1. NEVER fall in love at the shore

2. Bump-its, spray tans, and raccoon-esque eye makeup are acceptable somewhere

3. It’s ok to refer to your abs as “The Situation”

4. It’s also ok to refer to yourself as “The Situation”

5. Don’t mess with JWOWW in the clubs

6. You never know what has happened in a hot tub on the Jersey Shore…

7. I can never eat a pickle again without thinking of Snooki.

8. It doesn’t matter if your roommate just got punched in the face, DON’T LEAVE THE CLUB.

9. Ed Hardy=life

Lastly, and most importantly,

10. “Jersey Shore” taught me how to fist pump like a champ

From the moment “Jersey Shore” premiered on MTV, America fell in love with everything having to do with the show. I would be lying if I said I didn’t fall in love with it too. The best part of it is: it’s all reality. WHO KNEW THINGS LIKE THIS HAPPENED IN REAL LIFE?! Or the better question is: who knew people like this existed? I’ve never seen such…unique…people in my life.

Pauly D, with his overly gelled hair, The Situation and his “situation” (his abs. Though he insists on referring to them as “the situation”).  There’s also Sammi and Ronnie. But they bore me to death, so who cares? I find JWOWW especially entertaining, purely because of her vanity and violent tendencies. There’s no better way to spend an evening than watching a girl named JWOWW punch a guy who calls himself The Situation. Classy. But JWOWW is actually a very successful businesswoman who owns her own company. Allegedly.

Then there’s Snooki, the self-proclaimed “Princess of Poughkeepsie”, who went to the Jersey Shore looking for love. Haha. Good one. But after being insulted (multiple times), having pickles strategically placed throughout her room to make it stink, and being punched in the face, maybe Snooki deserves a little love. And she got that love. From all of America. We love you, Snooki.

“Jersey Shore” has captured the hearts of people everywhere. Not only is it entertaining, but it really shows what America should be all about: using violence to express feelings, partying, and FIST PUMPING!

(*This is not my real opinion. This is completely a joke.)